Phuoc stepped back and surveyed the field, taking in the neat, orderly rows of plantings. Slowly, a smile peeked out from under his trunk. It was finished. Phuoc and his father had put a lot of work into cleaning up this rocky plateau. Phuoc’s forehead felt raw from the trees he’d pushed over, and his tusks ached from prying up troublesome Read More
Author: Andre
Zion Lutheran Preschool
For almost three years, Zion Lutheran Preschool has helped our son become a better person. What more could new parents ask for, right? Well, Director Kim Luxoro and her staff have also made our family part of theirs, with true care, attention, and love. If you have the chance, we encourage you to give the Zion Lutheran family a shot. Read More
Hit
“No! I can’t.” The little pachyderm plopped down dramatically in front of the herd. “Yes, you can,” replied his aunt, not slowing. “We haven’t been walking for long. A big, strong pachyderm could keep going.” “I’m too hurt, I can’t stand. Look.” As his aunt passed by, the little pachyderm tossed himself onto his side, puffing dust into the air. Read More
Righteous Nonviolence
In our stories and histories, humans often glorify violence and struggle. We render conflicts great and small as physical confrontations with clear winners and losers. Reality, however, reveals few solutions born from violence. On Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, we should consider a different path. We should aim for righteous nonviolence, even if we fall short. Storybook Solutions Some men Read More
Beget (Violence)
The evening commute on the NYC subway system requires one to maintain patience, divest oneself of personal space, and ignore a substantial amount of noise. I do none of those three things well. My huge ears pick up far too much commuter crazy. No body configuration allows me to stand comfortably without jostling humans. And I’m a city pachyderm; I Read More
Resolutions
Happy New Year from Elephants Never! I hope you’re not tired of the year after just a week. (Although the cold and much-hyped “bomb cyclone” certainly made this a tough week for many of us.) While you and your herd get busy living 2018, permit me to share my New Year’s resolutions with you. Setting Goals If you haven’t recently, Read More
Foretell
“Come on, dude, just try it,” said Geoff, pushing the transparent sphere at Pacey. The big male shoved it away. His ears flapped as he shook his head. “Nope, not happening,” Pacey said. “What? Come on,” chirped Geoff. “It’s a friggin’ crystal ball! Take it for a spin.” “Elephants never foretell,” said Pacey. “What? What is that? A family motto?” Geoff Read More
New Year’s Eve Pachyderm Protocols
Happy New Year’s Eve! It’s the biggest party of the year, and we don’t have to go to work on Monday, so, rock star. Tell the Old Year Bye Now, I don’t know how you felt about 2017. I liked it. This year, I got a new job and started a website (which 3 people actually read, thanks!), so me Read More
Let (Friends Drive Drunk)
“Alright, I give, how can you tell if there is a pachyderm in the bathtub with you?” “You can smell the peanuts on his breath!” Ethan trumpets loudly, like he’s just told the funniest joke he knows. Rick feels a little fuzzy, but maybe not drunk enough to laugh at that one. “Yeeeah, maybe keep your gig at the zoo, Read More
5 Things Elephants Never Get
Here are 5 things elephants never get for Christmas, but always wish for anyway: Peace on earth and goodwill toward everyone Round tennis shoes An end to the ivory trade Pogo sticks Wool trunk warmers