Elephants Remember the 5th of November

Remember, remember the 5th of November…

Guy Fawkes Night has arrived, and with it, an opportunity. Now, before anyone suggests blowing something up, let’s take a look at the holiday and consider fomenting rebellion with ballots, not bombs.

Guy Fawkes Night

Remember, remember!
The fifth of November,
The Gunpowder treason and plot;
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot!
– “The 5th of November,” Poem of the Week

I come here not to analyze the origins of the day, nor the meaning of that rhyme. I recommend you rent a movie, if you seek inspiration. For our purposes, Guy Fawkes Night in the U.K. commemorates the failed overthrow of a sectarian ruler by a marginalized group.

The opportunity lies in remembering both sides of that event. (Believe me, elephants have the memory part covered.) On one side, the ruling powers undertook a patriotic defense of the government against sabotage and conspiracy. On the other side, citizens made a patriotic effort to reform a brutal, partisan regime. Sadly, the means of effecting change (gunpowder) resulted in arrests, a hanging, and burning effigies. Both sides, however, could have staked a claim to working for the good of the country.

Pachyderms at the Polls

In America, we often fluctuate between supporting traditional institutions and pursuing the freedom of self-determination. Do we go with the herd, or become rogue elephants? I mean, New Hampshire practically yells the state motto, “Live free or die.” Like with the U.K. gunpowder plot, we assume institutions and change agents form a binary equation.

Our system, however, has rebellion built in, if we use it.

On Tuesday, November 7th, many American citizens will have the chance to vote on elected officials ranging from public advocate to senator. If you have the ability to vote, I urge you to do so. Whether you believe elephants never foment, or you feel more mulish about our current administration, you have this chance to effect change while still supporting the system. Do not stay silent.

Ways to Change

If you want to shake things up on election day, try these ballots:

• The Write-In – Don’t vote for anyone on the ballot. Write in Aunt Dee, Uncle Miguel, or my Cousin Ray-Ray. Drain the swamp.
• The Turnover – Vote against every incumbent. If you don’t like what the government is doing, fire everyone you can.
• The Pro Diversity – Vote only for women, only for minority candidates, or only for minority women. Make every voice heard.
• The Brain-In – Like The Write-In, but target scientists, doctors, artists, teachers, and gurus. Support people with expertise in fields other than politics.
• The Term Limiter – Like The Turnover, but vote against only those who have been in office for more than 10 years.