“Alright, I give, how can you tell if there is a pachyderm in the bathtub with you?”
“You can smell the peanuts on his breath!” Ethan trumpets loudly, like he’s just told the funniest joke he knows. Rick feels a little fuzzy, but maybe not drunk enough to laugh at that one.
“Yeeeah, maybe keep your gig at the zoo, eh?” He goes to unlock the car. Then a trunk on the shoulder stops him.
“Whoa, Rick, c’mon, gimme the keys.” Ethan motions toward himself with one big forelimb.
Rick looks down at the keys in his hand, then wrinkles his brow.
“What? I’m fine, dude. It was just two beers.” Rick goes to open the door, only to find Ethan’s gray bulk blocking his way.
“Two beers in under an hour, and you know it’s not worth the risk.”
Rick turns square to his friend.
“Ok, dude, this is B.S. You had two more than me!”
“Yes, and I weigh 50 times what you do,” Ethan says calmly.
“Can you even get into my driver’s seat?” Rick stalls, while his conscience starts tapping its foot.
“Yes, we’ve tested this before. Kudos for getting the biggest Escalation Ettin SUV available.”
Rick sighs, but holds out the keys. Ethan gently takes them with his trunk, while guiding Rick around to the passenger side.
“Don’t get mad at me, dude. We had fun, right? But my mama always said, elephants never let friends drive drunk.
Ethan’s Joke
(I told you that other elephant jokes might appear in this space.)