by Anita Goveas I’ve always wanted a trunk. Hands are useful, but wonky lungs mean more time bumside-down means itches in hard-to-reach places. I saw Asian elephants at Chester zoo, Aunty Devika drove us from Stockport in her Mini Cooper. They liked to roll around in the mud, I could see that. But it turned into a two-inhaler day, so Read More
Tag: an elephant never
Forgive
Pachyderms have adapted to human society in so many ways, adopting our customs and manners with steady grace. Yet, the average human understands little about pachyderm culture or the ways it remains separate and distinct. Indeed, opponents of integration worry that dark and inhuman secrets remain concealed. Too often when the two cultures have conflicted, human ways have overpowered our Read More
Rest
They sway out of the dust, elongated noses and bottom teeth scraping at the ground. Huge, striped bulks of flesh and armored skin emerge from a storm they’ve carried from the steaming north. They look exhausted, but they won’t rest until they reach the flooded grasslands behind me. Indeed, this herd has marched relentlessly for hundreds of miles just to Read More
Shit
The older man in the floppy hat snapped another picture, and Ephram almost went rogue. Spirits of Africa, how many candid shots do they need? If they lingered much longer, Ephram wouldn’t be able to control himself. He had to shit! For the last half-hour, Ephram had been tromping about, flinging mud onto himself, and squeezing his butt cheeks hard Read More
Happy St. Patrick’s Day
Break out your green undies, set the cabbage to boil, and turn up The Chieftains on your stereo! On St. Patrick’s Day, every pachyderm can appropriate and enjoy a little bit of Irish culture. If you live in Boston or Chicago, you may even find participation unavoidable. For everyone else, we recommend you find a fiddle, step into the Riverdance, Read More
Urgent Notice
by Mileva Anastasiadou Controversial topics, previously imprisoned, have escaped the history closet and threaten to ruin social and family gatherings. Rumors go the escape has been enabled by recent riots that have been going on around the globe, in regions previously considered part of the civilized world, which in turn have been fueled by events which have been destabilizing predetermined Read More
Prospect
by Normand Lepine “Begin by always expecting good things to happen.” – Tom Hopkins They parked around the corner to stay out of view of the house they were coming to see. Nick and Tara had heard rumors of a large house where elephants who were not quite like the others came to hang out. The rumors were vague and Read More
Ferment
“Cheers,” I raise my glass. Pendo uses a forelimb to clink me, then dips his trunk for a taste. As the scotch squirts into his mouth, he rumbles. “Now that,” he murmurs, eyelids half-lowered in pleasure, “is worth keeping you humans around for.” Pendo’s huge mouth curls up in a smile. I frown over my laughter and poke at the Read More
Insist
“Thank you for seeing me on such short notice, Doctor.” “Anytime, Elysse, I’m here for you. Now, you said something about a troubling dream?” “Yes, I see it so vividly still… I haven’t wrapped my mind around it yet.” “Why don’t you walk me through it. I expect your concerns will emerge with the telling.” “Well, I’ve lost the beginning—” Read More
Elephants Never Foretell – Groundhog
Okay, so maybe we’re feeling optimistic. Maybe whatever groundhog you worship brought you less positive news. Where we come from, hope springs eternal, and our groundhog has the mayor scared to visit. What hope does winter have?